Garbage out, garbage in. That’s how that saying goes, right? Backwards? Are you sure? ‘Cause around here, it’s garbage out, garbage in.
Well, friends, in preparation for our upcoming interstellar tour – ENTER THE MIND 2010: THE ULTIMATE BIG GREEN EXPERIENCE – we have hauled most of our moth-eaten possessions out to the curb (on Admiral Gonutz’s orders). We have also begun to rack up commitments in the outer reaches of our galaxy (some “stellar” venues among them, I should add. Heh. heh. heh.). And, perhaps (but likely not) most importantly, we have identified a rent-a-spacecraft to replace our long since repossessed Jupiter 2 imitation craft. And hey, that ship, she’s a beauty…. NOT.
I should mention here that when I showed a picture of this moth-eaten craft to Mitch Macaphee, our mad science advisor (and the guy who makes every gizmo run), he turned a distinctly whiter shade of pale. Inside his enormous, distended brain, no doubt, flashed images of sleepless hours coaxing the skow’s antiquated engines into action as we drift closer and closer to a neutron star. (Chilling indeed!) I’m not sure into what dark alley Admiral Gonutz ventured to find this twisted piece of unspaceworthy tin, but he needn’t have bothered dragging it out. In point of fact, he had Marvin (my personal robot assistant) do the actual dragging… but if he thinks Mitch is going to work on this sucker for free, there’s something 
stronger than Borkum Riff stuffed into that pipe of his.
Will we actually get anywhere in this ramshackle conveyance, now that we are but days away from our departure to the great unknown? This member of Big Green is doubtful. But what the hell, we’ve done worse over the course of our spotted career. Look at some of our past tours, and you’ll see what I’m talking about. Tacked-together technology, hastily arranged performances, hostile alien interlopers. What keeps us going back, you ask? (You didn’t ask? Well then, I have a question for you: Why didn’t you ask?) We don’t think about it too much, as you can tell. We just do it… get it done.
So what’s on the menu for our tour lift-off? We shall see, my friends. We… shall… see….
