Tag Archives: Lauren Boebert

A little background.

2000 Years to Christmas

Nah, that doesn’t look all that great. Maybe move it a bit more to the left. How about a fill light or two. Is that any better? No? Right … start again.

Man, oh Manischewitz! This age of virtual meetings and electronic communications is annoying in the extreme. You freaking can’t do anything in person anymore. For the first few months we managed to keep a low profile by simply sending Marvin (my personal robot assistant) out to do our various tasks, like shopping, garbage removal, pretzel bending, molecule counting, and other odd jobs. Then last August, Marvin started reading Thomas Piketty, discovered the value of his labor and chose to withhold it from us, now that he considers us soulless capitalist exploiters. In response to Woke Marvin’s job action, we’ve had to go on Zoom, go on Google Meet, go on Skype, go on Facetime, go on, go on, go freaking on. Ever try doing your grocery shopping on Zoom? Don’t.

Hey, a lot of bands do whole concerts via these web-based video conferencing apps. That’s largely because, well, there’s no place else to freaking play – everything’s shut down and chances are good that a lot of the rickety establishments that supported plain-clothes bands will have fallen over backwards by the time people feel safe enough to venture out on a Saturday night again. Fortunately, we haven’t had to resort to such tactics. Mind you, I’m not ruling it out, but for the time being, we content ourselves with spending the pennies we make via streaming services on little bits of cheese, crumbs of bread, and a log for the fire. You may ask how we’ve managed to live so extravagantly off of what an indie band can make from web streams. The answer may surprise you. (It certainly would surprise me, because I haven’t the foggiest idea how we do it.)

Like my background?

So yeah, when we need to talk to a promoter or the people who own our squat house, we do the teleconferencing thing. The biggest challenge, from my perspective, is finding a backdrop that faithfully amplifies the kind of image you want to project to the world. For instance, authors often have their books prominently displayed behind them. Representative Lauren Boebert makes sure to have a jumble of assault weapons randomly dumped on a shelf behind her as she speaks. I myself had to think long and hard about what objects would best represent my values to anyone interacting with me over Zoom. I thought maybe a stack of sandwiches, but we don’t have anything like that lying about long enough to make it into the picture. I don’t know – maybe I should go with the Boebert approach, except a little more intimidating than just some poorly maintained long guns. Something that will make my interlocutors thinks TWICE about contradicting me.

Or maybe I should just show them dilapidated interior of the abandoned Cheney Hammer Mill. If that doesn’t scare the hell out of them, nothing will.

Fifth Column.

Last week their minions were storming the capitol building, attempting to stop the counting of the electoral votes by any means necessary. This week, all they want is for everyone to get along. Fuck that shit. Republican members of Congress, particularly those who actively supported stealing the election and handing it to Donald Trump (the loser) appear to have played an integral role in the insurrectionist attack on the center of American legislative power. As I write this post, the attackers are plotting an even broader campaign against both federal and state targets. There’s reason to believe that this campaign will not only coincide with the inauguration of Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, but that it will continue well beyond the change of power unless they are put down in a serious way. The only way to do that effectively is by holding their allies in Congress fully accountable and expelling those who coordinated with the racist minoritarian insurrectionists.

The House voted to impeach the president a second time this week. That’s a step in the right direction, but not nearly enough. Naturally the president should be removed and barred from holding public office ever again, and that should be done yesterday … or the day before, perhaps. But aside from that, we need a deep and timely investigation of this attack, with particular focus on who in the House and Senate may have aided and abetted these criminals. There’s some indication that cooperation may have involved both members and staff on the GOP side. Representative Mikie Sherrill of New Jersey, who spent part of last Wednesday hiding from the mob with Congressman Dan Kildee, has spoken about capitol tours given the day before by Republican congress members and staffers – tours have been suspended during the COVID pandemic – that were reminiscent of intelligence reconnaissance (Sherrill is a veteran).

Then, of course, there are members like Rep. Lauren Boebert from Colorado, a first-year congresswoman who promoted herself brandishing a handgun in some vain attempt to paint herself as Palin 2.0. Mission accomplished, as she appears to be a moron, like Palin, but also someone willing to egg on the angry horde that descended upon the capitol. “It’s 1776” she tweeted in advance of the attack. 1776? What happened then … a revolution, right? So … you’re in favor of the attack? Interesting. I understand that the relevant law enforcement agencies are looking closely at contacts between congress members and the mob – sounds like a good idea, but they’d best move with a bit more alacrity, because as I mentioned earlier, this battle is not over. If there’s a fifth column in the House and Senate, we need to know about it sooner rather than later. And we need to expel collaborators pursuant to the 14th Amendment. Now.

We didn’t get here overnight. We got here on a decade’s worth of lies about everything from Obama’s birth certificate to the legitimacy of 2020 election. We need to start holding people accountable, and the best place to start is with these freaks in the Republican caucus.

luv u,

jp

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